Twenties Life

Learning how to make a good first impression is perhaps one of the most important things you can do.  When you learn that you only have about 10 seconds to make an initial impression on someone and a few minutes before they decide everything about you, you realize just how crucial every little aspect of that first impression really is.

In order to be as thorough as possible, I’ve come up with a list of great tips for making a good first impression.

Look Fit

It may seem shallow, but the first thing people will notice about you is looks.  And the greatest thing anyone can do to improve their looks is to get fit.  While this is less of a “first impression” tip, it’s a universal tip that will follow through into every aspect of life.  The truth is that people who are lean and fit looking have an easier time making impressions and finding success than their non-fit equivalents.  Want to pass the first test of good impressions? Get Fit!

Presentation & Appearance

After the initial look down, the person will look at certain details of your appearance; grooming, fashion sense, attention to detail… things of that nature.  So, naturally, the next tip would be to always look good.   Make sure to always be dressing appropriately, and never be the under-dressed person at an event.  Also start paying more attention to your grooming.  Guys, tame the hair (on your head, facial hair, nose hair, ear hair, back hair, and where ever else that stuff is growing).  Ladies, same thing.  Also, for the ladies, ensure that your cosmetics match the event.  There is a huge difference between what is appropriate for downtown night life and how you’d apply your cosmetics for a day at the office.   Lastly, pay closer attention to your accents and accessories.  A nice watch, bracelet, necklace, or earrings (for the ladies) is sure to make an impression all by itself, boosting your overall appearance.

Body Language & Posture

Most people don’t pay conscious attention to their body language and that’s a real shame.  If you think it isn’t a big deal, try this out:  Turn on your TV and put it on mute.  Try to figure out what’s going on in the show, or at least whether people are happy or sad, comfortable or on edge, etc.  You’ll be surprised at how much you can figure out without hearing one word.  Body language is the universal form of communication, and if you can’t master you it, it won’t really matter what comes out of your mouth.

Always stand/sit up straight with your shoulders resting comfortably.  Pay attention to the position of your head when communicating.  An erect, slightly forward posture will send the message of interest and consideration to the person that you are communicating with, as well as a display of confidence and comfortableness.  Never cross your arms, cover your mouth or do anything that may seem like disinterest, like you’re hiding something, or like you are being any less than 100% genuine.

Good Hand Shake

Now that we have gone over appearance, it’s time to move to the actual communication.  The first lasting form of communication is the handshake (generally speaking).  You give me a handshake and I can accurately describe quite a few things about you.  Rather than going over that though, I’ll just cover the basics of a good handshake.

First, is body language.  Lean slightly towards the person you will be engaging.  Be sure to have a comfortable smile and square your shoulders facing the person.  Reach forward with an open right hand and give a slight nod (for most of us this comes naturally, as a “safety mechanism” to ensure that they see your extended hand).  Firmly grasp the person’s hand and introduce yourself.  Pay attention to their name (this will be important later).

As a general rule, a handshake should last about as long as it takes for both parties to introduce their names.  If the introduction is to be extended, break the handshake before things get uncomfortable or awkward.

The Charm

Confidence, courteousness, positivity and a few other magical ingredients make up this undefinable characteristic known as “charm.”  Some people have it naturally, but others have to work at it.  If you consider yourself the latter, and take the time to work on it, it becomes second nature.

First off, always be positive.  The easiest way to make a bad first impression is to be a “Negative Nancy.”  Nobody likes this person, they bring down the entire group, and they just aren’t pleasant to be around.

A smile is the difference between an acquaintance and a friend.  I’ve found that by smiling at everyone I meet (even just a slight smile), tends to create more lasting, more intimate friendships than just going through the motions of an introduction.  And I’m no George Clooney, so imagine what your smile could accomplish…

Finally, most of us could use a refresher course on confidence.  Some seem to be naturally confident, but for many of us it’s going to take some work.  The first thing you have to realize about confidence is that you are who and what are you, nothing more, nothing less.  Once you accept that and are ok with it, everyone around you will do the same.  Until you accept it, everyone around you will pick up on the subtle clues that you are not confident in who you are.

Here’s a good way to tell if you are comfortable in who you are: If someone who’s opinion you care about makes fun of your favorite shirt, would that cause you to consider whether or not to wear it next time?  Why?  If you are confident in who you are and what you like, other people’s opinions should weigh much less.

More to come in part 2 of this series “Great Tips For Making A Good Impression.”