Twenties Life

We all want to be healthy.  We all want to look good.  We all want to feel attractive.  But why do we torture ourselves with ridiculous fad diets, extreme workouts, and all sorts of other things to achieve those goals?  Are those methods even worth it?

I don’t think so.  That’s why I choose to live a lifestyle with my health in mind.  I don’t diet.  I’m not on a strict workout regimen, and I don’t read some sleazy pickup artists newsletter on how to get girls.  No, I do reasonable, simple, healthy things to achieve the goals I want.  I’m going to share 67 of them with you today, and I hope you’ll give each of them an ounce of thought.

In no particular order… Enjoy!

1. Take a multi-vitamin – chances are we aren’t getting enough nutrition with our usual diet, so start your day off right with a good multivitamin.  I use these, but any kind is better than none.
2. Sugary Drinks – you wouldn’t believe how many calories are in some of the things we drink.  The problem with liquid calories is that they rarely provide much substance.  Limit your soda and fruit juice drinks and try to drink more water.
3. Food - pay more attention to what you eat.  Stay away from eating too many white things, and try to eat more colorful foods.  Colors tend to be more nutritious than white foods.  Less bread and rice, more fruits and veggies.
4. Snacks – Don’t be fooled.  Granola bars may seem healthy, but they pack a sugary punch.  Pay close attention to the snacks that you eat.  Calories add up fast.
5. Skip the Elevator – Ok, if you work on the 28th floor of your building, this might not work.  But take the stairs whenever it’s practical (at least on the way up).  After a few weeks of this, it will become second nature, and you wont even want to get in that elevator.
6. Drink Lots of water – it helps you lose weight, keeps you feeling alert and energetic, and is necessary for all of your body functions.  Drink up!
7. Create Fit habits – for instance, I created a rule for myself: I must do 25 push-ups before I take a shower.  Simple things like this add up throughout the day.
8. Sleep better – quiet, darkness, a good pillow, a warm blanket… set yourself up for good sleep.  Keep a glass of water nearby in case you get thirsty.
9. Eat more fish – the fatty acids in fish are really good for you.  They oxidize fat (make it easier to lose weight), are great for brain function, help with skin and hair health, and so much more.  Eat more fish!
10. 15 Minutes of Sunlight – Did you know that sunlight is where we get our vitamin D?  If you aren’t spending time in the sun, you could very well be vitamin D deficient.  Take a walk, sit on your porch, do whatever it takes to catch some rays.
11. Monogamy – less sexual partners = less chance of getting an STD.
12. More Sex – sex is good for mental function as well as immune health.  Plus, it’s just plain fun.  Get some!
13. Eat less red meat – don’t cut it out entirely (unless your vegetarian), because red meat is a fantastic source of protein and iron.  But most Americans eat too much, and that’s a bad thing.
14. Take a walk after a large meal – When you feel all sleepy and slow, that’s your body feeling overloaded by the amount of digestion it has to do.  Don’t go to sleep, your body goes into rest mode.  Instead take a walk.  Get the blood flowing.  Help your body out, since you’re the one that punished it with that huge meal.
15. Stop Dry Cleaning – The chemicals in most dry cleaning processes are toxic and are known to damage the liver and kidneys.  Stop using dry cleaners as much as possible.
16. Chew Gum – it keeps the digestive juices flowing and helps you burn more calories throughout the day.
17. Take a nap - relieve some stress, and just plain enjoy the silence.  Naps are shown to be great for mental function and they aid in the learning process.
18. Calisthenics - push-ups, sit-ups, jumping jacks, sprints… all of these simple exercises are great for you.  They raise your heart rate and work your muscles.  And they are free.  Here are a few great calisthenic exercises
19. Wash your hands – Your hands carry bacteria with everything you touch.  Wash now and wash often.
20. Dance Dance – it burns calories and is super fun.  Put on some tunes and get that body moving!
21. Vaccinate – Modern medicine has cured many diseases and vaccines are a way of preventing outbreaks of some of them.  Get your shot records and make sure to stay up to date.
22. Regular Checkups – when’s the last time you went to the doctor just for a checkup.  I think it’s time you do so.
23. Limit the alcohol – or skip it all together.  Alcohol is known to damage so many parts of your health, and the benefits can be achieved by something as simple as grape or pomegranate juice.
24. More fruit, less fruit juice - Fruits have fiber and other nutrients that are lost in the juicing process.  Whenever possible, choose the fruit over its juicy equivalent.
25. Eat nuts – they are delicious and nutritious.  They are a great source of mono-unsaturated fat (the good fats).
26. Don’t forget the dairy – Yogurt, cheese, milk.  Great protein and reasonable amounts of fat.  Scoop it up.
27. Never skip breakfast – It’s the perfect opportunity to start the day off strong.  Get some fruit, oatmeal or bread, eggs, milk or cheese, and even a meat in there for a super strong day starter.
28. Learn a new sport – it’s great for the body and mind.  You’ll learn to coordinate your body in a way you aren’t used to, you’ll build strength and speed, and you’ll have fun with friends.  It’s a win, win, win?!
29. Nintendo Wii – what a genius little invention.  They found a way to make video games healthy.  Who could say no to that? Pick one up on Amazon.com.
30. Stretch, Stretch, Stretch - How is it you can walk into any gym on earth and find 99% of people going straight to their workouts without stretching or warming up first?  I actually have a stretch workout, where I only stretch, for 1 hour every monday.  Flexibility is key to good health.
31. Play an instrument – it’s a great hobby and it’s great for the development of your mind.  You’ll learn things you never new and you’ll keep your brain in tip top shape.  Plus, people will think you are a badass!
32. Butt out – cigarettes are terrible for you.  You know it and I know it.  Quitting will probably be the best decision  you’ll ever make, so don’t put it off.  Do it now.
33. Don’t take prescription drugs unless directed to by doctor – Just because your brother had the flu and the doc gave him a prescription doesn’t mean it’s a good idea for you to take it when you feel a flu coming on.  Be smart…
34. Say No to Drugs – I’m surprised to know that so many people my age have used drugs.  You know they aren’t good, you’ve seen how they ruin lives, you’ve learned about their addictiveness… why do you try it?  I just don’t get it.
35. Learn something new – developing new skills is a great way to improve brain function and boost self-esteem.  So do it already.
36. Cook your own meals – When you know what you are eating, you tend to eat a bit healthier.  Use raw ingredients instead of their pre-packaged counterpart.
37. Diets don’t work – most are unhealthy, and many leave people depressed and sometimes even weighing more than before the diet.  Skip the diet, develop the healthy lifestyle instead.
38. Don’t forget the fat – a healthy diet is a low fat diet, not a no fat diet.  You need some fat to lose fat (as crazy as that may sound).  Just limit your fat and you’ll be great.
39. Healthy Friends = Healthy you – surround yourself with other healthy people and they might just rub off.
40. Have fun – if you don’t enjoy the lifestyle that you are creating for yourself, you won’t stick to it.  It isn’t until you’re having fun that it will stick.
41. Cardio – get your heart rate up, using any method from dancing, to running, to getting it on!
42. Resistance Training – pick up something heavy, put it down, pick it up again… resistance training builds muscle, muscle eats fat for dinner… moral of the story, you’ll be super hot!
43. Colorful Foods – foods rich in color tend to be rich in nutrients.
44. Cook with herbs – they are great for your health and they make you feel like you belong on the Food Network.
45. Protein it up – dairy, lean meats, nuts, beans, protein shakes… this is the stuff that builds muscle, so get more.
46. Limit the sugar – sugar is not so good for you.  It converts to fat really easily, and has no nutritional value.  So take it in moderation.
47. High Fructose Corn Syrup – it’s in pretty much everything sweet, and is terrible  for you.  Try to avoid it as much as possible.
48. Manage your stress – stress raises cortisol levels.  Cortisol is a muscle wasting hormone.  Control your stress, control your health.
49. Dress well – people who dress well feel good.  People who feel good take good care of themselves.  You see where this is going…
50. Play video games – they may not be the best thing for your health, but if you like them, play em, in moderation of course.  Happiness is good for your health.
51. High Intensity / Low Intensity – many people argue that to lose weight you need to do long and boring low intensity workouts.  That just isn’t true.  The best way to lose weight is to mix it up.  So do that.
52. Forget about weight loss – The goal here isn’t a number, it’s a mindset.  Get healthy and you’ll look sexy.  The rest doesn’t matter.
53. Get friends involved.  It’s easy when everyone is doing it.
54. Hydrate - as if this wasn’t stressed enough, drink more water.
55. Get the gear – I’ve found that new workout clothes are a great way to motivate yourself to exercise.
56. Choose a model and put him/her on your fridge.  Every time you go there you’ll see the picture and it will remind you of your goal.  You won’t eat crap whilst looking at your goal.
57. Just get outside – Make a small goal, like walking down 3 houses and coming back.  Each day you’ll get a little further.  In no time at all you’ll be walking miles, and you won’t have a single day of soreness or pain.  Pain doesn’t equal gain, consistency = gain.
58. Before and After photos – nothing is more motivating than working hard for a couple of months, taking a picture, and seeing the difference from a couple of months prior.  You’ll get so excited you’ll work even harder for your next photo.
59. Go slow – there is no finish line, and you’ll never be in “perfect” shape.  So go slow, and enjoy the journey.
60. Socialize regularly – socializing wards off depression and stress, both of which can contribute to mental deficiencies.
61. Skip the multi-tasking – your conscious brain is really good at doing one thing at a time, so work with it, not against it.
62. 15 minute imagination vacation – relax, go to a quite place, and just exercise your imagination.  Think of places you’ve never been, doing things you’ve always wanted to do, meeting the person of your dreams, etc.  It’s a super relaxing exercise, and every day you’ll get better at it, until it becomes like walking or eating.  It’s the perfect way to get away from it all, even if only for a few minutes.

I’m sure I could keep going, but we all have a lot to think about here.  Do me a favor though, scroll down to the comment section below and share your favorite way to get lean, healthy, and sexy.

Let’s bring sexy back!

At the age of twenty-something, I’m assuming most of you guys will be getting ready to head out into the real world. With that mind, I’ve collected a few quotes especially for you. In the cold, hard world of independence, you’re going to need all the inspiration you can get. Some of you will face easy times. Some of you will face hard times. But in the end, I have hope that one day you will all achieve the lives you desire.

If these quotes can add even just a little bit to your dreams, then I’ve done my job.

Without further ado, here are 20 motivational quotes. Share these if you like:

1. “Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it’s always your choice.” - Wayne Dyer

2. “Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.” – Ashley Smith

3. “To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.” – Unknown

4. “The difference between school and life? In school, you’re taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you’re given a test that teaches you a lesson.” - Tom Bodett

5. “Don’t wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful.” – Mark Victor Hansen

6. “Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life – think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success, that is way great spiritual giants are produced.” – Swami Vivekananda

7. “To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children…to leave the world a better place…to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

8. “Striving for success without hard work is like trying to harvest where you haven’t planted.” - David Bly

9. “The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.” – Walter Bagehot

10. “Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.” – Mark Twain

11. “And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” - Abraham Lincoln

12. “The good life is inspired by love and guided by knowledge.” -Bertrand Russell

13. “People grow through experience if they meet life honestly and courageously. This is how character is built.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

14. “Courage is the discovery that you may not win, and trying when you know you can lose.” – Tom Krause

15. “Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.” – Herman Cain

16. “Anyone can give up, it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that’s true strength.” – Unknown

17. “If I had to select one quality, one personal characteristic that I regard as being most highly correlated with success, whatever the field, I would pick the trait of persistence. Determination. The will to endure to the end, to get knocked down seventy times and get up off the floor saying, “Here comes number seventy-one!” – Richard M. Devos

18. “Glance into the world just as though time were gone: and everything crooked will become straight to you.” - Friedrich Nietzsche

19. “What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes

20. “Never mistake knowledge for wisdom. One helps you make a living; the other helps you make a life.” – Sandra Carey

photo credit: Ahmed Rabea

John Anyasor is the creator of HiLife2B. There he gives advice on personal development, inspiration, and motivation. A second year undergrad, he seeks to one day break the cycle of entering the dreaded 9-5 to achieve the life he wants.

Twitter: http://twitter.com/CJAnyasor
Website: http://hilife2b.com/blog

Whether you’ve realized it or not, having an Emergency Fund is the difference between a life changing event and merely a depletion of funds.  Answer me this:

If you busted a tire on your car, could you afford to buy another (without a credit card)?

If you totaled your car, could you afford another (immediately)?

If a natural disaster caused damage to your home, are you financially prepared to repair it?

If you got fired today, how long would you be able to support yourself financially?

All of these questions are designed to get you thinking about your “financial pillow.”  An Emergency Fund isn’t only smart, it’s insurance for all the little things life doesn’t prepare you for.  It helps you sleep at night.  In my opinion, it’s a good idea to have at least 3 months worth of living expenses covered in your emergency fund, and 1+ year is even better.  But obviously it’s not that easy to just put all the money in their, right?  WRONG.  I’m going to give you a few simple tips designed to get that Emergency Fund growing, without taking a hit to your current lifestyle!

1. Get out of Debt – This goes without saying, but I’ll say it anyways.  It doesn’t make sense to build a huge Emergency Fund when you still have large amounts of credit card debt.  Chip away at that first, and once it’s down to a reasonable level, start throwing money at the Emergency Fund.
2. Treat it like a bill – Decide on a comfortable number, or even better percentage of your income, and stick to it. Pay your Emergency Fund every month just like you do your cellphone.
3. Start Out Small – Not everyone can afford $250+ per month, but that doesn’t mean you should put off starting your fund.  Do what you can do, and if that’s $40 per month, than next month your fund will be $40 bigger.
4. Automate your transfers.  I have mine set up to deduct from my checking and into a special savings account once per month.  I never have to think about it again.
5. Open a high-yield online savings account – I use IngDirect, it’s online, free, and easy.  And here’s a BONUS, if you open an account with $250 or more, using my referral link, they’ll give you a free $25.  If you needed an account anyway, you can’t argue with free $$$.  Contact me here for the referral link.
6. Never spend anything less than a 5 dollar bill. This is an interestingly genius idea.  If you hold on to all of your one dollar bills and coins throughout the day, and save them each night (in a coin jar or whatever), it adds up pretty quickly.  You’ll be funding a big fat Emergency Fund in no time.
7. Stash Gift Cash – Ever get cash gifts from mom, grandma, or other family or friends?  Do the responsible thing, save it for a rainy day.  You wouldn’t have missed it if you didn’t get it anyways…
8. Tax Returns/Rebates – It might be difficult to convince you to stash your entire tax return away, since so many people look forward to that check each year.  But stash a percentage.  I’d go with 15-25% as a modest goal.
9. Sell Your Junk – One man’s trash is another man’s treasure.  Go through your closet, attic, junk drawers, etc.  Ebay the junk that’s worth something and stash the rewards.
10. Work an Extra Shift - Each month, work an extra shift and dedicate those earnings to your Emergency Fund.  It’s time to be responsible, and sometimes that means sacrificing a day or two for the future.

Bonus – Freelance It – Have a skill that you could use for profit?  Create a Craigslist or other personal ad offering your talents for a small fee.  Do this once per month and save the money for a rainy day.  Your Emergency Fund will thank you.

That’s it.  It’s that easy.  And even if each of these tips only totaled $5 per month, you’d have $50 to add to your emergency fund this month.  Can’t argue with results, right?

What is your Emergency Fund building strategy?  Leave it in the comments below.

A couple of years ago, while in college, I wrote this article.  I published it at a college development website I was working on.  But it’s so important that I think it bears repeating.  And no matter how the times change, the principals are still the same.  I hope you’ll read it carefully and really think about it.  It could change the way you look for a mate.

There is no one true way to find the person of your dreams.  No person, book, or secret will give you 100% success in this area of life, because let’s face it, love isn’t a science.  Love is a living being in itself, and as we all know, living things can sometimes be rather unpredictable.  So I can’t guarantee that by following my tips here you will find the mate of your life.  If I could, I’d be rich, and you’d all be giving me your money.  Since you aren’t, you’ll have to read these tips and hope that they aid in the success of your future romance.

Preface

First off, and this is going to be a huge shocker to most of you twenty-somethings, stop thinking you are going to find the love of your life in a bar/club/(insert trashy drunken scene here).  The fact is that if you find someone who could be the man/woman of your dreams here, they were probably the man/woman of someone else’s dreams last weekend.  And there is a good chance they will be the man/woman of someone else’s dreams next weekend.  Do yourself a favor and look in places where the person you meet will remember your name tomorrow.

Meet People for the sake of Meeting People

I’ve noticed it takes young adults a long time to realize that sometimes it’s ok to meet someone without having a preset agenda.  You don’t have to be looking for a best friend/drinking buddy/ man of your dreams…  It’s ok to just meet, hang out, enjoy yourself without the weight of wondering what this is or where it’s going.

Also, try to spend more time with friends that aren’t friends with the rest of your friends.  In doing this you will generally meet more new people, since you will meet their friends, which are not yet your friends.  Many times we fall into the same routine, hang out with the same 3-6 people, and never meet anyone new.  And then we complain about not meeting the right girl.  It’s no wonder…

People who neglect this integral step often find that they continuously enter relationships, which they realize later, just aren’t working for them.  And they do this over and over.  If only they had enough experiences with enough different people to have a better understanding of what they wanted.  All of those heartbreaks could have been avoided.

Complement Everyone

Every person I’ve ever met enjoys a good compliment.  We all know a good compliment when we get one;  “Your hair looks fantastic” when you just got it done, “That shirt makes you look big” when you’ve been working out.  A good compliment just feels good.  And everyone remembers the guy/girl that makes them feel good.  Always be that person and it can only lead to good things.

Be Brave

Though it may not be on everyone’s list of sexiest characteristics, it definitely is one of the most important ones.  People find a person of confidence absolutely irresistible.  A confident suitor is the equivalent of the strongest, fastest lion in the jungle.  They never go hungry, and they get all of the lionesses.  Be the lion.

Be Smart with Your Emotions

It sounds silly just typing that title.  But you have to understand the power of emotions before you start using them.  Think about a big powerful machine, like a car.  You don’t just get behind the steering wheel and start going.  You have to understand the power, skills required, and responsibilities associated with operating a car.  Then and only then can you be considered safe to operate such a powerful machine.  Emotions are the same way.  If you haven’t learned to control and use your emotions beneficially, you aren’t yet fit for a relationship.

I’d bet many relationships fail not because the two people couldn’t last, or weren’t in love, but because they were not readily equipped to handle their emotions.  And when you can’t handle your emotions they become terribly destructive.

Avoid Romantic Blinders/ Have Real Expectations

This one is simple, and yet ignored more often than any other tip I have.  If you are a religious person, you probably won’t have a successful marriage with an Atheist.  If you hate sex, you probably won’t get along well with a nymphomaniac.  Why do we psych ourselves into believing that love can conquer all?  It really can’t people.  It just can’t.  Make a list of characteristics that are important for your future husband/wife to have.  Do not enter into a relationship with someone who does not match the characteristics that you think are necessary. You won’t be able to convince them later on, and you don’t have the right to make them change, so save both of you the heartache and just don’t.

Understand Compromise

If you haven’t been in a serious relationship before this will probably be new to you.  So let me be blunt.  Imagine the perfect Man/Woman of your dreams.  Somehow we always imagine that he/she is exactly what we want, does what we want, says what we want.  There is no conflict, no disagreement, no chaos of any kind, right?

Now take that cloud of imagination that is floating above your eager mind and smash it to bits.  This is not a Disney movie.  This is real life.  And to be honest real life is 10 times better than any Disney movie, and also 100 times worse.  If these are your expectations you will probably never be truly happy.  But if you understand that you will have to sacrifice, compromise, and basically give up some of your expectations in order to please the other person, and that you’ve found someone just as willing to do the same for you, you will be happier than those princesses ever dreamed.  Because you will have found someone that isn’t perfect, and probably isn’t even perfect for you.  What you will have found is someone even better.  Someone who is willing and wanting to work hard and make sacrifices to be that person for you, because they love you and want to be all that for you and more.  When you find someone who works to be that person, you will have found a real life, honest to goodness, Princess/Prince Charming.

Don’t Be Lazy

Laziness shows in every aspect of life, from gaining a few pounds to laundry on the floor.  Nothing is more unattractive than a person who doesn’t have it together.  You may not realize it now, but a relationship is much like laundry, if you don’t spend a few minutes routinely taking care of it, it will get worse and worse, and sooner or later it will be too late.  Take care of yourself in every aspect of life.

What makes you interesting?

This question basically decides whether or not your relationship will last past the first date.  For some people, looks may get you to date 2, but most of us want more.  Answer that question, What makes you most interesting? If you don’t have a good answer, you don’t have what he/she wants, so you better get one.

Boys will be boys

This is something that I’m appalled some people still don’t get.  Boys like video games and lifting weights, girls love to shop and (insert stereotypically female trait here).  Don’t try to take that away from him/her.  It’s what they do.  You wouldn’t put a lion on a vegetarian diet, would you?  Let him be him.

Show you care

If I asked your close friends how much you cared for them, would they have a serious answer?  Would they know, or would they be assuming?  Let people know how much you care about them and they will automatically care more about you.  The easiest way to turn an acquaintance into a friend is by having them understand that their friendship is important to you.  And if they know you value a relationship with them, a relationship with you becomes more valuable to them.

Don’t just listen

Contrary to popular belief, being a good listener isn’t that great.  People don’t enjoy friends that listen;  they enjoy friends that listen, understand, respond, communicate, and share.  Believe me, it takes a lot more effort than just hearing them.  Be interested in them.

Be Sexy

A nice girl is ok. A great girl is cool.  A cute girl is awesome.  A sexy girl is irresistible.  Which do you want to be?

Do the little things that make you sexy.  Perfume, lotion, proper grooming, nice clothing, a nice smile, and many more things will boost the SEX factor, which will lead to increased attention from the opposite sex.  Be careful, though, too much sexiness and you’ll find yourself crowded with too many people wanting your sexiness.  Use sexy wisely.

Increase Your Sex Appeal

Quick Tips

1. always smile. people love happy people.
2. ask interesting questions. everyone loves talking about themselves, and interestingly enough they will find you intriguing just by you letting them talk about what makes them interesting.
3. Never be “too available.” people like people who have their own things going on.
4. Be Yourself. Though it’s probably said too often, you’ll find it too hard to keep up the facade, and sooner or later they’ll find out who you really are.
5. Skip the games. I don’t think anyone really enjoys the games that people go through when trying to get into a relationship.  Do yourself a favor, be the person who skips the games.  He/She will greatly appreciate it.
6. Keep High Standards. Don’t let him/her think you are willing to settle, or that you deserve less than you want.  Keep your standards high.  It’s better to be alone than to give yourself to someone who wont appreciate you.
7. Show genuine interest. People love people interested in themselves.
8. Always Improve Yourself. The bums will be scared off by your pro-activeness, and those working to improve themselves will find you irresistible.
9. Surround yourself with great people.  You will be judged by the company you keep.  It may not be ideal, but it’s the truth.
10. Go Where Mr. Perfect will be. If you are looking for a well read person, don’t look in bars and clubs.  Instead check out book stores and book readings, etc…

So what do you do to find the Man or Woman of your dreams?  What tips can you give others to help from making the same mistakes over and over again?  Leave comments and let us know.

Appalled. Outraged. Sick. Who could write something like this? Do guys really follow what they read in this stupid magazine? UGH!

These thoughts were steaming through my head as I was reading the February issue of Maxim magazine. For those of you who do not know, Maxim magazine is like the Cosmopolitan magazine for women, filled with sex secrets, clothes secrets, and dirty laundry. Why was I reading Maxim you ask? I saw on the cover of the magazine, “Sex: Have Your Cake and Eat It Too.” (Of course I like cake so I kept reading) Then as I kept reading trying to find the cake part, the article continued with “How to cheat and not get caught” Wait a minute…wait a minute. There is no cake in this!?

So I shake my head in disbelief, yet somehow keep reading. The article can be found here http://www.maxim.com/humor/stupid-fun/87491/sex-have-your-cake-eat-it-too.html. The article uses Tiger Woods’ situation to highlight how men should cheat on their spouse/girlfriends and not get caught. The buffer the article by saying that it is written by experts, women! Huh? Women tell men on how to cheat on women? So, enraged, I read as Maxim gives out tips by women to tell men how to cheat such as changing the mistress’ name in the cell phone to a dude’s name so that it will show up as a guy when she calling him.

Of course I immediately rush to ask my guy friends “Do you believe this crap? How could Maxim publish this? Shouldn’t we be encouraging men, women everyone to be together? Shouldn’t we be teaching people that cheating is not okay and should not be taking lightly?” The response has been 50/50, with a few “calm down Nadias” in there. However, I can’t help but wonder what has happened to the sanctity of marriage? Much more people are not getting married at 18 anymore. Quite a few people are waiting to get married, but yet it does not seem like that waiting makes one more mature to enter into marriage. Have I been so blinded and in a bubble to not realize that maybe cheating has always existed and what was once taboo is now becoming a social norm?

Personally I take the position that one, I haven’t been so oblivious to cheating, but like most try to skirt it as an issue that doesn’t exist and two, cheating should and forever be taboo.  However, there are others who would disagree with me and that’s okay, just make sure I don’t date you.

Marriage should not be taken lightly. Not only are emotions involved but a lot of time and resources are as well. Prime time for getting married or entering into a serious relationship tends to occur during your twenties. However, this age also presents a rough time personally as many go through life changes such as school career changes.  When two people commit it often means that instead of two separate lives they have to basically live as one. Each others decisions affect another. That leads to disagreements or a shake up in relationships. Sometimes people adapt and sometimes they don’t. When people don’t agree however, I do not think that should be the sign for a woman or a man to check out what’s on the other side while still being committed. A divorce and breakup are costly. Many people use the cost to deter them from getting a divorce yet still choose to stray. I firmly believe that if you are not mature enough to maintain a monogamous relationship, then you shouldn’t be in one, and you definitely should not be taking anything to the next level. If you are so immature that you have to change stuff in your cell phone to conceal your cheating, you are not ready to be in any relationship.

Yes, I know, sometimes shit happens. But does that mean you can do what you want? Does that mean you can continue doing what you are doing without letting the other person know? You want cake? You want to eat it too? Then bake your own damn cake. Don’t go tasting other cake that doesn’t belong to you. No licking the frosting either.

You think you won’t get caught?  Maybe. However, what if you do? For both men and women, do you think if you follow silly tips in a magazine that they are fool proof? Heck no. One way or another, karma is a bitch and will find you. Maybe you knock up the chick you are cheating on, maybe the guy you are cheating on starts cheating on you. What then? Not so fun anymore when your feelings get hurt.

I could care less about Tiger Woods, former President Bill Clinton, and the like.  What they do in their personal lives is really none of my business. What is my business, however, are things that glorify and compromise the sanctity of a monogamous relationship and marriage are flourished and encouraged? It becomes a problem because now the dating pool is tainted. Not like it was not tainted before, but now, it’s looking so acceptable to cheat and be unfaithful. We the single people have much more to worry about than what our boyfriends/girlfriends are texting, calling, and hooking up with on Facebook.

My advice to magazines like Maxim and Cosmo: Focus on what really matters. Write an article about being faithful and making the best of your relationship with the person you are supposed to be in a relationship with. The whole purpose of marriage is for two people to commit themselves to one another for the rest of their lives. A ring is a symbol of your love; it has no beginning and has it no end. There is no room in that circle for diversion.

There will always be many more people who will cheat and many more people who will apologize for what they have done. It won’t end. Hopefully though, it will never come to a time where cheating becomes a social norm and not be an acceptable part of a relationship. I want my cake all to myself.

The weather is perfect! The sun is out and the breeze is nice and cool. So much better than the freezing winter and the scorching heat of the summer it’s right smack in the middle and I’m in heaven! Ready to pull out my jeans and layer tanks, it’s a comfortable lounge wear time of the season. Comfortable tanks for the beach and for lounge wear while you’re out and stylish tanks and shirts for work and night life. I ventured out to find a couple of comfortable tanks for this season. Abejas boutique in Houston is definitely the spot and queen bee of comfortable, casual wear just in time for spring break!

All of these tanks are amazing finds, soft to the touch and easy to layer up to throw over a pair of jeans or some wide leg cotton pants comfortable and casual for this nice, cool weather.

Must:

I feel that Victoria’s Secret is well known for their lingerie when we’re quick to forget that they’ve actually got great apparel for women. They’ve really hit spring on the nose this season with great finds and great prices and may I mention really great colors.

Victoria’s Secret has amazing racer back, double scoop neck, and tanks with built in bras all featured in lovely colors to celebrate spring! I found quite a few tanks under $30 bucks. Now that’s a steal! Not bad for such elegant and fun tank tops that go great with jeans! If you’re spending spring break at a lake house or at the beach check out their website for cute sundresses and tanks to pop on over your bathing suit. If you plan on eating out during your spring break after swimming or laying out all day throw one of these cute tanks on over a pair of jeans with a nice pair of wedges..

Try the V-neck halter bra top (#253-819), only $25.50. An awesome cut to flatter any figure and great over jeans try the V-neck halter bra top in bright melon, a perfect punch of color for your apparel. Don’t forget the tanks that are elegantly flattering and a perfect steal for your spring wardrobe! These prices are great and these items can be staple pieces for layering this spring: The Henley Tank in paradise pink which is only $10 right now (#225-596), the Lace racerback Bra Top tank on sale now for $15 (#184-600), and the new Racerback stretch tank (#259-408 ) 2 for $20 right now.

Visit Victoria’s Secret online for shopping made easy at http://www.victoriassecret.com/

Lust:

Abejas boutique located in Houston features designers from all over the United States and is home to the most comfortable lounge wear that I have ever encountered! Comfortable to throw on and amazingly soft to the touch, these tanks are a lust but definitely a must if your budget calls for it!

I switched out a few tanks with the same pair of jeans to show the different looks of each tank. Oh the endless possibilities in the store! These were a few of my favorites and I didn’t have much time. I wish I could have pictured everything! Unfortunately my schedule didn’t call for it so here are a few that I know you’ll love!

This tank is part of the Wilt line. A great piece to layer over a white tank for the cool breezy weather of spring and is amazingly comfortable with jeans. Paired with a rosary necklace (one of many Abejas accessories) and pointed toe boots. Try some of the boutique’s flip flops like the K Jaques Cyrus flip flops imported from France (below):http://www.abejasboutique.com/detail.aspx?ID=67214

This is a great tank! I layered it over a comfortable white tank & again paired it with a rosary necklace of a different color. This is just an all around great top made by Tysa, a great brand which never ceases to be comfortable. Check out the website to purchase this top

http://www.abejasboutique.com/detail.aspx?ID=67378

Tysa Tobago Tank Mink

This top sold out like hot cakes. Be sure to check back in to the boutique for more Raquel Allegra. To learn about the designer check out the site:

http://raquelallegra.com/

For updates on availability of Raquel Allegra at the Abejas boutique in Houston check out their website:

http://abejasboutique.com/

Also keep up with the website for new merchandise is always coming in. You definitely find apparel there that is one of a kind at this boutique so keep posted and stop in if you’re in the area!

Enjoy your new finds and venture through both websites to find tanks that are great layering pieces and perfect colors to make your spring as delightful as the weather and perfect to pair with the apparel that you already have. Enjoy!

Listen of the Week:

This listen is perfectly catchy! Great to roll the windows down and enjoy the fresh and cool air of spring.

“I Feel it All” (Britt Daniel Remix) – Feist

Listen to the song here.

Picture in your head the working world and remember the application process through which millions acquire jobs everyday. To succeed in the corporate world, you typically write up a resume, send it out to multiple companies you may or may not desire to work for in the next few years, and eagerly sit by the phone waiting for someone to ask for an interview. And let’s say that you weren’t the best student ever in college. Let’s say you’re just an average person coming from an average college. You and your resume are just like everybody else and their resumes.

Think about it. There are millions of students looking for jobs after college. How are you going to differentiate yourself? How are YOU going to stand out from the other applicants? Everybody and their mother has volunteered at shelters and hospitals. It’s not the first time someone’s put “a few years of community service” on their resume. A lot of people win awards and travel overseas. I’m asking you, what other option is there?

I’ll answer this question with another question:

What are you doing?

That’s right. What are you doing everyday? Are you building something? Are you a part of a movement? Do you have a blog on which you spill your guts about the subject in which you want a career in? While everyone else is sending out resumes and waiting by the phone, are you doing the same? If so, I wouldn’t call you back for an interview even if you begged me. I’m 100% sure that any employer you are looking to hire you is going to ask, “So what have you been doing currently?” If you have nothing to say, then don’t bother sending your credentials.

Be more than just your resumé

You aren’t your resumé. You have to be better. You aren’t just a list of past events. You have to show you have value and you have to be working towards something that will make your future employer give your resume a second look.

Take these tips to heart:

1. Do something else besides sending out resumes. Create something! Start a movement or join an important cause in which you’re active in.

2. Cultivate a unique skill that could possibly benefit the company you want to work at (For example, you could put on your resume that you’re a master of Photoshop and web design. Not everyone can say that)

3. Be honestly interested in the job you’re applying for. It’s okay to want money, but if the desire to work isn’t there, actually working will be much harder to do.

While these tips won’t completely guarantee you’ll land your dream job (it’s life: when is it ever certain?) you will be a much more attractive candidate than the college valedictorian who’s been just simply sending out resumes like clockwork. Because whether or not you succeed at a company, and ultimately in life, depends on more than what put on paper. It depends on what you can uniquely bring to the table.

Got stellar grades in college? So? There are thousands of students who get them. Set yourself apart and you instantly become better than a large portion of the applicant pool. So, in the immortal words of just about every other personal development blogger out there:

DO SOMETHING!

photo credit: SOCIALisBETTER

John Anyasor is the creator of HiLife2B. There he gives advice on personal development, inspiration, and motivation. A second year undergrad, he seeks to one day break the cycle of entering the dreaded 9-5 to achieve the life he wants.

Twitter: http://twitter.com/CJAnyasor
Website: http://hilife2b.com/blog

This is the third part in a three-part series.  If you haven’t already, read part 1 and part 2.

Hi. It is me again, with one last segment on your interview process. The process would not be complete if I did not give you any advice on the interview itself. So I hope you are looking pretty, with appropriate attire and your resumé on crisp clean resume paper. Now that you are prepared with the look and the paper, it is time for the interview! Hooray! Do not panic. Do not throw up. Do not back down. Have faith in yourself. I will have you ready in no time! So here are my tips for the interview:

The Interview

1. Research! You need to research your potential employer. Know good information about them so you can use that information in the interview. It will show that you are serious about the company and show that you have an interest in the job. For example, looking at the stock and what the stock is trading at currently. Another example is looking on the company website. Did they make any big mergers? Deals? How are they appearing in the press lately? If it is a smaller company, do people know about them? What do the advertisements look like?
2. Using your research in the interview: An example: Interviewer says “What’s your interest in our company, why us?” You say, based on your research, “Well, I find it interesting that your company is trying to develop a newer type of coal energy that will reduce greenhouse emission. Actually I read an article on USA Today that talked in depth about the process and your technology. I amEarth conscious and would love to me part of such a new and exciting technology that will save the Earth’s resources.” Interviewer says “Impressive. You’re hired” (Just kidding about the last part, but they will be impressed)
3. Research! (Again.) Sometimes you will know who will be conducting the interview. Do not stalk the person, but get to know information about them. Facebook is an excellent resource to use. Find something general about that person and use the information to your advantage. Let’s say that you find out that your interviewer loves the Astros. Interviewer says “Tell me about you.” You respond with all of the blah blah blah boring stuff about where you were born and raised then zap “I like sports too. Have you been following the Astros? I wonder how they will be doing this season.” Interviewer says, “Oh the Astros are my favorite team!” (Two points for Interviewee, job is closer to being in the bag)
4. Practice your interview. Get a friend or loved one or your family to give you a mock interview. Record it so you can see your body language and facial expressions. Have them give you critiques. This will be a good practice for those who get nervous during interviews.
5. Firm Handshake. Reach in there and don’t squeeze but do not forget to actually touch the person and shake their hand. It shows that you are not afraid and you are ready to reach out and touch the world. (Not in a creepy way)
6. Eye contact. Maintain eye contact. Looking down and around is a sign of nervousness.
7. Watch your fidgeting. Again you do not want to appear nervous.
8. Eat a good breakfast/ lunch. You do not want your stomach doing the talking for you. IF you do have a lunch interview, be modest, but not too modest. Order something reasonable. Chances are the company will pay, but do not be afraid to offer to pay for your meal. Do not order anything sloppy. Stick with an easy medium like soup, salad, or a sandwich.
9. Pay attention to the questions that are asked. Engage with the interviewer.
10. It is okay to smile and be human during your interview.
11. Do not forget to thank your interviewer. Follow up your interview with a thank you card.

I hope these tips will help you snag a great job. Right now it is tough to even get an interview, but do not be discouraged. Just know that if you do get an interview and you follow these tips, you will be in good shape. Happy Interviewing!

Have you ever bought a gadget or electronic only to find out days later that there is a better model, cheaper model, or that you just aren’t satisfied with your purchase?  It happens to all of us sooner or later.  Luckily, here at TwentiesLife, you’ve got a techie nerd who loves keeping up with gadgets.  Ibrahim is like that guy you call when your computer breaks.  You know, the one who tells you that it’s because of all the porn you watch (no matter what’s wrong with it…).  That’s him.  And he knows his stuff.  Here are his top picks for this spring.

Flip UltraHD Camcorder, 120min

If you’ve had a chance to play with one of these, you probably realized just how much you need this.  It shoots in 720p HD, can record 2 full hours of video, has rechargeable batteries, and unlike most camcorders, is a breeze to learn and fun to use.  You pull it out of your pocket and within 3 seconds you’re ready to shoot all the girls flashing in Cancun, or your boyfriend about to bust his ass trying to do some stupid bike trick.  Ok, so maybe I’m bitter cause I can’t do any bike tricks.  But still, this camera is awesome.  And the reason I chose this over the other flip hd cams is that this one had HDMI output, which means that with a hdmi cable you can playback right on your TV, to entertain all of your family and friends with your cinematic genius.  Watch out Quentin Tarantino, there’s a new badass in town.

Price: $146.54

Apple iPod touch 8 GB (3rd Generation)

I’m going to be honest.  As a true gadget geek, I try my best to avoid apple products.  Not because they aren’t cool, but because the average person loves them, and everyone knows geeks pride themselves on being anything but average.  The truth is, though, that I just can’t avoid this thing.  I owned an iPhone for about 2 years before realizing that it just didn’t do what I needed as a phone.  But when I switched I realized just how many applications I really missed.  As of spring 2010 Apple still has the market for mobile apps.  Maybe the future will bring a new champ to the top, but facts are facts, and Apple is winning.  Plus, let’s not forget that this is still an mp3 player as well.  You haven’t been treating your huge music collection very kindly lately, and it’s time for a change.  Pick up this iPod touch and do almost everything you can do with the iPhone except make calls (which it doesn’t even do well, but that’s a complaint for another day.

Price $183.99

Kindle

I know you’ve been on the fence about this one.  You wonder if it’s really worth it to pay for books and only have them in digital format.  Or maybe you aren’t ready to read books, newspapers, and magazines on a screen.  Well, let me just tell you that you are wrong.  Plain and simple.  But I’m not just saying this because I’m a genius and thus smarter than you.  No I’m saying this because the Kindle is badass, and if us techies have our way they will all but replace books completely.

They are green (no paper), you can get the book, magazine, or newspaper within 60 seconds of wanting it, and that screen is freaking amazing.  It’s not like anything you’ve looked at before.  It’s not like a tv or computer screen.  It’s like you are reading paper.  I don’t want to get all technical on you, so you need to just see it for yourself.  I could read on this thing all day, and just give up books completely.  Forget about Barnes and Noble, you don’t even have to put pants on to get your favorite book with this bad boy.  Just search, buy, and read.  Can’t beat it.

Price: $259.99

Asus EeePC 10.1 inch Netbook

I owned one of the first Eee PC netbooks.  I loved it.  It lasted 6 hours on a battery, had a huge hard drive (more songs, pictures, and video storage), and could do anything I wanted it to.  Well things have only gotten better since then.  I used this new EeePC netbook and I was so impressed.  It’s thinner (about half the thickness of the one I had), lasts 11 hours (no that’s not a typo), and is sexy!  It’s sexy like a Macbook air, without the arrogance and pretentiousness.  If you don’t have a netbook yet, this is the one you need. Don’t shop around, don’t price compare, don’t do anything but click the button below and get this delivered as fast as you can.

Price: $328.71

Western Digital My Passport 1 TB (1000 GB)

Holy crap, I didn’t even realize they made them this big without needing to be plugged in.  This thing is tiny, sleek, shiny, and fast.  It holds the equivalent of about 500,000 pictures, about 200,000 mp3s, or about 1500 movies.  It could hold more books than your local library.  This thing is serious business.  It’s a little bigger than the average man’s wallet (though it’s much thinner).  If you need portable storage (and trust me, you do), this is the hard drive you need to get your hands on.  It’s relatively inexpensive and is backed by the trusted Western Digital name.  It’s time to backup all those pictures from your high school graduation, previous spring break vacations, family reunions, and the one time you drank a little too much and got frisky with the camera.  Pick this up and it will be years before you need more storage.  Right now they are 25% off, so grab one before the price goes back to retail!

Price: $149.00

So, to wrap things up, you need each of these products to be more tech savy, more interesting, more fun, and basically just cooler overall.  Sure you could get by without 1 or 2 of these, but is that the life you really want to live?  I didn’t think so.  Get um now.

What are your favorite gadgets this spring?  Leave a comment below and show and tell.

In Wonderland

No wonder it’s all the rave! With a hot cast, daring costumes and a great soundtrack Alice in Wonderland has taken viewers by storm. I will venture into Alice inspired looks, eye shadow inspired by the movie that’ll drive you mad if you don’t have, and a soundtrack that’s creatively fashion forward.

Gear up for a look into Wonderland.

Lust:

Colleen Atwood, Oscar winner for best costume design, designed the costumes for Alice in Wonderland. For a fun feel and a new spin to Alice’s clothes Atwood made the movie ravishingly fun with looks that were daringly fashion forward throughout the movie. I had my eyes peeled as “Drink Me’s” and “Eat Me’s” came along I was ready to see another one of Atwood’s dresses. The costume design is remarkable and I am ready to see Alice’s dresses up on the market.

Must:

After seeing Colleen Atwood’s designs in Wonderland I wanted to get my hands on something Alice inspired now. Avril Lavigne collaborated with Disney on her Abbey Dawn line featured at Kohl’s and pulled together looks completely inspired by the movie. The line is versatile and can be made into a girly, casual, dressy, or edgy look. These pieces can be mixed and matched and that’s what I love about it!  Here are a few pieces you should definitely try:

www.http://kohls.com

Beauty Products of the Week:

I am always seeking out beauty products fit for a queen! These are a few that I have tested and now I use them on a weekly basis! Although I fell in love with most of the products that I have tried, these are the few that stuck out in my mind that I wanted to share! These products will vamp your roots, volumize, and hold your hair for hours. Don’t hesistate to grab these products while you’re out shopping!

Speaking of queens and your highness, TIGI has revamped their Catwalk line. They have changed the line’s color from blue to purple to distinguish the difference between their products. The purple pops and sticks out but for customer’s who have used the product for years might have a hard time finding it because of the color change. For those who haven’t used the Catwalk line yet, you are in for a real treat! Not getting the volume you want for your hair? Having a dull time with the styles you try? There’s a little trick to give your hair the right kind of lovin! Spray in Catwalk’s “Your Highness” the brand new and revamped root boosting spray which used to simply be called “Root Boost”. I’m liking the new name and I’m still loving the product! Give it a try on your hair, promise, you’ll love it!

TIGI has another line that I am absolutely head over heels for, well, at least for the Rockaholic hairspray. I put it to the test and this hairspray really does hold all day. Even my lazy curls stay intact til the end of the day. Great to spray on before you go out, even on straight hair. Don’t let the Texas humidity get to you save yourself, and your hair frizz to the Rockaholic hairspray.

Also, check out the exclusive Urban Decay Alice in Wonderland ‘Book of Shadows’ shadow swatch kit. It features an exclusive Alice in Wonderland pop up scene surrounding a mirror on the front of the shadow kit. The eyeshadow have fun theme names like ‘Jabberwocky’, ‘Mid-night Tea Party’, ‘Wonderland’, and ‘Mad Hatter’. Available on urbandecay.com/ or at Sephora.

http://www.urbandecay.com/categories/AliceInWonderlandPalette.cfm

Listen of the Week:

The Alice in Wonderland Soundtrack has an all-star lineup featuring new music from Avril Lavigne, Robert Smith from The Cure, Mark Hoppus of Blink-182, and the All American Rejects. There are 2 different soundtracks featured for the Tim Burton movie one being the Alice and Wonderland Soundtrack featuring the music for the motion picture and one being ‘Almost Alice’ which is a soundtrack of contributing artist for Alice and Wonderland. On top of being a phenomenal movie the soundtrack ‘Almost Alice is a wonderful side kick!

Buy on Amazon

Buy on Amazon

Tracklisting:

1. “Alice (Underground)” performed by Avril Lavigne
2. “The Poison” performed by The All-American Rejects
3. “The Technicolor Phase” performed by Owl City
4. “Her Name Is Alice” performed by Shinedown
5. “Painting Flowers” performed by All Time Low
6. “Where’s My Angel” performed by Metro Station
7. “Strange” performed by Tokio Hotel and Kerli
8. “Follow Me Down” performed by 3OH!3 featuring Neon Hitch
9. “Very Good Advice” performed by Robert Smith
10. “In Transit” performed by Mark Hoppus with Pete Wentz
11. “Welcome to Mystery” performed by Plain White T’s
12. “Tea Party” performed by Kerli
13. “The Lobster Quadrille” performed by Franz Ferdinand
14. “Running Out of Time” performed by Motion City Soundtrack
15. “Fell Down a Hole” performed by Wolfmother
16. “White Rabbit” performed by Grace Potter and the Nocturnals